While Keba and I were at Starbucks together today, Keba noticed that a man sitting at the table across from us was busily drawing with pastels, and frequently glancing at our table. “I think we’re being drawn,” she said. The idea was cool. Our afternoon of catching up would be documented forever.

Before we left, we chatted with the man who was drawing us, and watched as he put finishing touches on our individual close-up portraits. The more time passed, the more colors he added to our faces. Green and purple lines soon accented our faces. Is my skin really *that* yellow?? And my nose–there’s no way it’s that large. In Keba’s drawing, she had no neck, and it bore no resemblance to her whatsoever. The man didn’t blatantly ask for money, but we gave him a couple of bucks for his work anyway. As we were leaving, he said, “When you look at this, it’ll make you smile. That’s why I do this. I want to make people smile.”

When we got back to the car, we studied our portraits and cracked up over how little they resembled us. But the man was right. Even if I don’t plan to frame and display my drawing, I will definitely smile when I look at the drawing and think of our afternoon together.

It has been a longtime dream of mine to swim with dolphins. Ideally, I would want to be swimming in open waters when a wild dolphin would just happen to come up to me and invite me to hang on for a ride. The closest I’ve gotten has been kayaking in the Gulf Coast and being at the same level as dolphins about 30 feet away. Absolutely amazing. And most recently, I read in an issue of Reader’s Digest that dolphins have been known to protect humans during shark attacks. They are such amazing creatures! After that, it was confirmed in my head. I MUSt swim with a dolphin.

Since Matt and I have been planning a trip to Mexico (south of Cancun to be exact), I’ve been looking into all the activities that we could do. I’m extremely excited about two things. 1). The time of year when we will be going is the start of the nesting season for sea turtles, and we’ll be able to spy on them laying eggs on the beach. My parents got to witness this in Costa Rica (I think), but we didn’t go to that part of the country on our trip, so I was bummed that I missed it. This will be our chance to make up for that. 2). There are several marine parks that offer opportunities to swim with dolphins! They’re very Sea World-ish, where you go through training for 20 minutes and then interact/swim with a dolphin for 40 minutes. It’s still a hefty sum, but significantly less expensive than what Sea World charges.

I was SO excited and determined to do it. But while I was out sick yesterday and heavily frequenting the TripAdvisor forums, I read several comments about how people should reconsider their involvement in “swim-with-a-dolphin” excursions for the dolphins’ sake. Although the establishment could be highly reputable (like Sea World), there’s a larger picture to consider.

I began doing some of my own research, and found some helpful information on the World Society for the Protection of Animals page that echoed the same advice of many other animal protection websites. The main arguments include:
1. Dolphins can swim more than 40 miles a day and are not meant to swim round and round in an enclosed area, as large as it may be.
2. Their exposure to humans can make them vulnerable to infection and bacteria.
3. They are trained to kiss, give high-fives and do other tricks, but they are trained to do that because they’re hungry–and all they typically get is a dead fish or two.
4. Even using captive-bred dolphins doesn’t make it right, because the treatment is still the same. Plus, the new dolphins are not contributing to the conservation of wild dolphins.

I have no doubt that the animals at such establishments like Sea World (which I love!) are treated well and humanely. But the fact is that they are not in their natural environment, and to not be in their natural environment inhibits their potential to flourish.

There are many, many things I’d like to do before I do, but swimming with dolphins is definitely one of the top things, even more so than skydiving. I know I will absolutely love the experience if I were to do it, but I also don’t want to support this industry that exploits these beautiful creatures. I refused to drink turtle soup in China because I like turtles (and the turtle shell was still at the bottom of the pot!), but this is a bigger deal than that. I’d love to hear what you all think. I know some of you may be rolling your eyes right about now, but please try to approach this as objectively as possible. What would you do?

Since 1997 (with a hiatus between 1999 and 2003, and sporadic entries during the early 2000s), I’ve been keeping a book journal. Being too cheap to buy a pre-made one at the store, I got a blank notebook and taped in my own section dividers: Books read, Books to read, and Additional comments. The journal begins with an entry for a book titled “Angel flying too close to the ground” by Annie Garrett, and I described it briefly as “a typical fairy-tale love story. Cool cuz (like how I spelled it with a “z”??) one character is a journalist.

As I flip through the journal, I could see the phases that I went through in terms of book subjects. Toward the beginning, I was drawn toward stories of love and idealistic romances (not to be confused with romance novels!), and scribbled down quotes uttered by two people in love. Then I went through a science fiction phase, centered around one particular author who penned a series that I liked. Fast forward to 2007 and later entries when my reading habits picked up speed, which cover books based on real experiences. These stories include an AIDS-infected boy from South Africa who makes history by attending school with other healthy kids; two friends who spend five months being homeless in six American cities; a college-age girl who hides in a bathroom with other women during the Rwandan genocide in 1994; a woman in Iran who writes about her imprisonment; and a man who selflessly gives all he can to build a school in a remote Pakistani village. And consistent themes that are carried throughout the years are writing, traveling, and strong women–sometimes all in the same book.

I just put in a new entry into my journal: The Innocent Man by John Grisham. It’s his first nonfiction work, but, as usual, centers around law. The book covers the unfair trials and unjust imprisonment of two men who are convicted of killing a girl. When I finished entering in my short review of the book, I flipped through the pages of quotes I’ve written down over the years from other books and was reminded of how amazing books are. I love books. So much.

So every so often, I will post a quote or two that is logged in my book journal. Maybe you’ll like it as much as I did. Maybe you won’t. And if you want to share a quote from a book that you’re reading or have read, please do so.

To start off, here is a quote about books. Novels, to be specific. It’s sort of long, so bear with me:

A novel works its magic by putting a reader inside another person’s life. The pace is as slow as life. It’s as detailed as life. It requires you, the reader, to fill in an outline of words with vivid pictures drawn subconsciously from your own life, so that the story feels more personal than the sets designed by someone else and handed over via TV or movies. Literature duplicates the experience of living in a way that nothing else can, drawing you so fully into another life that you temporarily forget that you have one of your own.

That is why you read it, and might even sit up in bed till early dawn, throwing your whole tomorrow out of whack, simply to find out what happens to some people who, you know perfectly well, are made up. It’s why you might find yourself crying, even if you aren’t the crying kind.   (High Tide in Tucson, Barbara Kingsolver)

When we originally scheduled our flights back to LA for Christmas, I calculated my three vacation days left, given holidays, weekends, and found that our time away totaled 10 days. “What am I going to do for 10 whole days?!” I thought. Of course there were the Christmas gatherings with family, but aside from that, the days were open. I brought two books, my laptop, and figured I would fill up the days somehow.

I scheduled most of our times with friends in the early part of the trip. Had lunches and dinners with friends, had a craft day with Mel and semi-successfully made really cute wallets, played Harry Potter Scene-It with Melanie and Abby (while eating Harry Potter-themed candy, thanks to Jason), and crashed a romantic date between Matt and Kevin.

Minus the Christmas festivities, that left us with still several days of unplanned activities. It took me a few days to adjust to not having stuff that I needed (well, wanted) to get done. Could I really just sit in the room and read a book or browse on the Internet? Should I be helping Matt’s mom in the kitchen? Can I take a nap or is there something I should be doing? I was a little restless in between meeting up with people. I must admit now that I did check my work e-mail (just to see if there were any urgent e-mails–not like I was going to respond to them. I just wanted to be prepared…). And I also chatted with my friend/co-worker Melanie to see what was going on in the office and back in Seattle. (Not much was going on except for snow, people being homebound, and antsiness to get outside.)

But after a few days, I began to relax. I reread “A Wrinkle in Time,” read stuff on the Internet, slept in (and soundly!!), and *gasp* even played video games. One morning, Matt and I walked to a coffee shop nearby and sat outside eating a pastry and drinking a white chocolate mocha. The sun was shining, and we had no where else to be. A friend from church walked by and said, “Boy, must be nice to be on vacation!” It sure was.

There were fun family moments, as well…baking cookies and making dinner with the siblings, going to Magic Mountain (the SoCal version of Great America) despite dropping the car keys during a ride and feeling partly responsible for Jon *almost* getting sick because I wanted to go on Riddler’s Revenge just one more time, and going to dinner and the Griffith Observatory with Matt and Jon. Despite my tendency to like things ultra-planned out, these things just happened–and it all worked out well.

I told my mother-in-law that I had been sleeping so soundly during my stay. In Seattle, I rarely sleep through the night without waking up at least once. She suggested that maybe I was sleeping so well because I wasn’t thinking about things I had to do the next day. I had never even thought about that, but she was totally right. I don’t think that I worry about the things on my schedule or to-do list, but I think my mind and body is always gearing up for what will come next. And that’s the thing–there is always something to do NEXT.

One thing I’d like to work on this year is to preserve some of the relaxation and rest that I found during our time back in LA, while still being productive and pursuing the activities that I enjoy. And if I do find myself with an afternoon when I want to just lay on the couch with a book, I don’t want to feel guilty about it or allow my mind to think about what will come after the book. In 2009, I want to learn to rest and be still–and a big part of that is mental rest, as well.

As for the rest of our Christmas, I had a great time with the Ips. I had always wanted to be a part of a big family, and by marrying Matt, that desire came true. All four kids were home, plus two parents, one grandma, one family friend, and one dog. Talk about a full house! One could say it was stressful to have so many people living in one house, but I found it to be fun and cozy.

In a way, I still got to spend a tiny part of Christmas with my family in the form of a videochat via Skype on Christmas eve, as well as on Christmas day when the Wongs were at my folks’ place. That chat, however, was spent mostly trying to decipher the chaos of multiple cousins crowded around the computer monitor. Eden and Gabriel lasted the longest and made faces into the camera. At one point, Eden asked Matt if he had a PS3, because apparently, if Matt did, he and Eden would be able to play games against one another. Matt said, “You have to tell Mel to let me get one.” Eden responded, “Shame on you, Mel, for not letting Matt get a PS3 to keep in touch with your cousin.” Then she and Gabriel shook their fingers at me and chanted, “Shame on you. Shame on you.” Matt, sitting next to me, followed suit. :P

By the time we got back to Seattle, we were exhausted and denying the need to return to reality. We spent new year’s eve holed up in our house, eating frozen pizza and watching a movie in our PJs. It was our perfect way of ringing in the new year. Today we got off our butts and kicked off the new year with an amazing snowshoe hike near Denny Creek with new and old friends.

Hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas and a happy new year!

I took many pictures in LA, but here is just one. When we took this picture, Kevin said, “I wonder if this will get on taffystay.com!” So just for you, Kevin, here it is. There are a ton more pics on my gallery–enjoy!

Despite knowing Makeba (or Keba, which she typically goes by) for only two years, Matt already refers to her as my second spouse. Keba and her husband Aaron moved to Seattle a month after Matt and I did, and Keba also worked at World Vision. We sat on the same floor, and I often looked right into her cube whenever I picked up papers from the printer. But since we worked in different departments, we never had any reason to interact, and never were introduced to one another.

In fall 2006, I attended a volunteer orientation at the Union Gospel Mission. A few minutes into the orientation, Keba walked in and sat next to me. “You’re the girl by the printer!” I said to her. After the meeting, we hung around and talked, immediately feeling like we saw eye-to-eye on many things. I remember going home after the meeting and telling Matt, “I met this girl named Makeba who works at World Vision, and she doesn’t want people to think she’s rich, either!”

After that, we were pretty inseparable at work. If I wasn’t in my cube, whoever was looking for me knew to look in Keba’s cube–and vice versa. Sadly, she left WV last summer to start grad school at the University of Washington. “Oh good,” my co-workers joked. “Now Mel will get more work done.” Even with her busy schedule at school, she makes it a point to schedule dates with me so that we could catch up in person every few weeks.

We’re quite different in a lot of ways. She’s outspoken, assertive, extroverted, talkative, and sharp. Sometimes I wonder how we became such close friends. But I think our similarities and our complementary personalities make it work. I can always rely on Keba to keep me posted about the latest workshop on social justice issues, meet up for boba, or sacrificially put herself at risk of being attacked by blackberry bushes in our backyard. More importantly, I know that I can always open up to her and that I’ll find an impartial listening ear.

There’s way more to Keba than what I can share in a few paragraphs, but, as a way to ring in the new year, I’ve posted the following questions, which will give you some insight on her. If you want more, check out her blog. (And even if you can’t become friends with me on Facebook, you can connect with Keba on there.)

1. One goal you’re striving for…To be healthy.  I really want to develop a regular fitness routine for life and eat better foods.  This involves being more organized so I can plan ahead for meals and make healthy things at home instead of eating out.

2. You’re stranded on an island and you have two books, two albums and two movies with you. Which ones would they be? Hmmm.  Books: A Bible and Bridge to Terabithia.  CDs: probably Indigo Girls “Retrospective” and an album by Sara Groves.  Movies: Good Will Hunting and Sister Act II

3. Name a book or movie character that you most identify with and why? I can think of lots, but honestly the first thing to pop in my mind was Ariel from the little mermaid.  I always felt like I understood her yearning to be free.

4. One word you’d use to describe yourself: Impulsive

5. One word others would use to describe you: Aaron says impassioned

6. Ideally, what would you do with your time once you finished your Masters and why? Oh, the million dollar question.  I’d like to work in a position where I : (1) interact with kids, (2) address systemic oppression, (3) influence changes in policy, and (4) don’t totally burn out.  I think maybe I’d like to work in an educational or group home setting.  I’d also like to have more time to spend with friends and neighbors.  I’d really like to get a dog, and maybe even have a kid.  And more plants.  And I’d like to cook more.

7. What’s the biggest difference between living on the West coast from living on the East coast? There are a lot of major differences.  The biggest thing I noticed when we first arrived is how many people ride bikes, compost, and recycle.  Also, one major difference between Seattle and most places I’ve been is that riding the bus is not an indicator of class or race.

8. What have you learned about yourself since moving to Seattle? I think I’ve learned that we (humans) keep growing and changing, even after we graduate from college and get married.  Aaron and I have both thought a lot about issues and formed new opinions on things that we didn’t think would ever change.  I’ve also learned that I shouldn’t be so vocal in my opinions, especially if they keep changing.

9. What scares you the most when you think about being a parent? I honestly don’t have many fears about being a parent.  I think about what it would be like to lose a child, and that is scary.  I also think about what I would do if my kid made really bad choices, or became an addict, or put themself in danger.  I think it is scary knowing how little control parents really have, especially after kids are older.

10. What do you look forward to the most about being a parent? Watching and facilitating my child’s learning.  I think it is so cool to see kids develop, form ideas, and then act on them.

11. You have a big heart to help those who have a great need. What moves you to do that? Um, self interest?  Just kidding, though to be honest I am sure this is some of my motivation.  I don’t really know.  I think I’ve always been a very sensitive person.  I feel other people’s pain in a weird way (I cry when I read the news a lot).  I’m not sure but I think some of that developed as a result of losing my dad and the process of greiving that loss as a kid.  I think most of my desire to help others comes from imagining what they are experiencing.  After I became a Christian in high school it also hit home that this is part of my purpose here on earth; to be the hands and feet of Jesus. It seemed clear that this was a command, not just an option.  Still, I have to check the motivation of my heart and make sure my actions are not out of legalism or guilt.

12. If you could channel the strength and spirit of any historical figure, who would it be and why?
Oooooh.  Good question Mel.  I have to pick one person?  I guess Mother Teresa.  The thing about Mother Teresa is that she never wanted to be recognized for her acts of love, but she always wanted to take the opportunity to teach others.  I’m sure there are others like her in the world who got less recognition but had the same humility and spirit of service and love. I think the one thing I’d like to “channel” is the ability to see all humans as made in the image of God, without inadvertanly judging that some are more or less “deserving” of my love.

13. If you could add any one aspect to your personality, what would it be? I’m not sure if this is a personality attribute, but I would really like to be more disciplined!

14. If you could go back in time to give yourself a piece of advice, when would it be, and what would you tell yourself? In high school and the beginning of college I was so wrapped up in my own little world of drama.  I wish I could tell myself that it just wasn’t that big of a deal, and that I shoud stop being so self absorbed!

15. The thought that usually pops in your head when you first wake up is…? Crap, am I late?

No more champagne
And the fireworks are through
Here we are, me and you
Feeling lost and feeling blue
It’s the end of the party
And the morning seems so grey
So unlike yesterday
Now’s the time for us to say…

Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend
Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have our hopes, our will to try
If we dont we might as well lay down and die
You and I

Sometimes I see
How the brave new world arrives
And I see how it thrives
In the ashes of our lives
Oh yes, man is a fool
And he thinks he’ll be okay
Dragging on, feet of clay
Never knowing he’s astray
Keeps on going anyway…

Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend
Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have our hopes, our will to try
If we dont we might as well lay down and die
You and I

Seems to me now
That the dreams we had before
Are all dead, nothing more
Than confetti on the floor
It’s the end of a decade
In another ten years time
Who can say what we’ll find
What lies waiting down the line
In the end of eighty-nine… [or, in our case, 2008]

Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend
Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have our hopes, our will to try
If we dont we might as well lay down and die
You and I

(Happy New Year by ABBA)